I completely understand the situation you are in. Social pressure becomes family pressure which is displayed in the form of emotional trauma and it become a mental mess! So many emotions flying at home from different sides that one ultimately has no choice but to succumb to all the pressure. It becomes more so when we ourselves have doubts and are not sure about the way forward.
When I went through this situation years ago, I took up a lot of healing spiritual practices. I declared myself depressed and in need of clarity and strength and kept warding off all the pressure saying that I am not in a mental state to handle the pressure. Yes, unfortunately, I had to become 'depressed' in order for my people to understand that there is something like mental health. And only later did people even think in terms of gender.
I agree that a major part of our society is not even sensitized to mental health forget about gender issues. However, its each one's personal fight against first her/himself and then against all the ignorance around and to stand up for what one believes in. So yes, I feel one needs to have all the courage one can muster, focus on every step ahead and cross every bridge as it comes. There is no one approach to handle these situations. Each one has their own way of fighting and succeeding.
So to start with its important to accept oneself. Once we are clear in our mind about who we are then the strength to be ourself automatically will come. And when we are confident, people will automatically understand : may not be all but definitely our loved ones will.
All the best